I'm Feelin' 22(weeks)

Well, so far we have made it to 22 weeks. This is already a huge milestone that I did not think we would reach since the doctors told me I wouldn't even make it through our first weekend. I know I haven't updated since our hospital visit, but I have just been frustrated and overwhelmed with everything that is going on. I have a feeling this will be a decently long post considering I have two weeks of information to add into this, and a bunch of happy pictures.

To start off we will go back to after our 20 week hospital visit and skip straight to our 21 week appointment. During week 20, it wasn't bad. The bleeding stopped by Tuesday, we went home, and we just waited for our next appointment. The day came for our appointment and it was with a doctor I had never met before. We started talking about everything and she asked me if I had been in touch with Anchorage and I told her no, they still had not called. She told me that they had sent the paperwork two weeks ago, but there may have been a problem if they hadn't called, so they had resent the paperwork the day before. She asked me if I had any questions and my only real question was, what is the plan for now. After I asked that, she sighed and told me that she was going to be honest with me. My heart dropped because I had no clue what information I was about to be told. I didn't know if I was going to be told I would no longer be transferred, if a test came back bad, or what. Then she tells me that her and her entire department are aware that I called patient advocacy, and now it would be a lot harder to help me or give me answers because of how much scrutiny my case is under. She said that she doesn't think that her colleagues did anything wrong, but now everything they do has to be precise. She also told me that she knows this is clearly hard for me to deal with, but she wanted me to know that it's hard for them to deal with, too. This made me really mad. I honestly didn't know what to say and I wasn't getting any answers from her. I don't know what kind of person would try and guilt trip someone in my situation for being concerned about their hospital care, but I knew the rest of the visit was not going to go well.

She had me lay down on the table and she pushed extremely hard on my abdomen right below my belly button. It did not feel good, but it wasn't unbearable. She did her ultrasound and he was still moving and heart was still regular. Then she told me to undress from the waste down so she could do an exam since I had pain when she pushed down. She said it could be an infection. I told her no, I would not do a pelvic exam, as they make me more prone to infection. She again insisted that I should consent to one, but she couldn't make me. I again told her no. Instead she decided she would be able to tell from a blood test instead. I let her know I had another appointment after hers with the behavioral health person and that I needed to be shown where it was, as well as get Travis from the waiting room. We went out to the waiting room to get him and she went to go and make sure the lady was ready for our next appointment. I told Travis what happened and as soon as I finished, the doctor came back out and called me back in to talk to me about something else. She forgot to talk to me about a blood test result they had gotten back from my anatomy scan. The result said that there was a possibility of a space in Declan's spinal chord. She said that she didn't know how to properly read the test because none of the scans showed any abnormalities in his spine, so it could just be a false positive.

I walked out even more upset and frustrated, grabbed Travis, and went straight into our next appointment. This appointment was basically just to talk through some of our emotions and get anything we needed. It was a very helpful appointment, and it calmed me down a bit. After this was over, we stopped by the lab to get my blood work. I realized I am now petrified of getting any needle work done. The lab tech noticed and said it would be okay, but she did have a little bit of a problem finding a spot that wasn't bruised from my previous blood draws and IVs. She did it quick and painless, and I left to call my mom and tell her what had just happened.

Of course my mom was not happy to hear anything and immediately went into researching if she was allowed to tell me those things. We quickly were told that it is illegal for her to talk about my patient advocacy call with me. By the time we got home, I started noticing some pink fluid again, and knew I was going to start bleeding. I then realized that ever time I start bleeding it was because a doctor or nurse pressed on my stomach against my protests not to.

Within a few hours, we got a call from Anchorage. They wanted to set up a virtual appointment for me the next morning at 9 am, so we go all of that in order. A few hours later, I got a call from the doctor earlier that day. She told me that my blood work showed that I did not have an infection, but I was becoming more anemic despite my increased iron pills. I was told to increase them again. She also told me that Anchorage would be calling me that day, and I let her know they already did.

The next morning, we woke up for our online appointment. The doctor was very nice and we went over our plans, and when we would be transferred. He told me it would be at 23 weeks, but we asked if we could be sent a little earlier since I would be 23 Weeks on a Friday, and he agreed to the end of 22 weeks. His office called me about an hour after our appointment to set up our in person appointment. Our date was set for May 21st, 2020.

Later that day, I noticed I was bleeding more. I went to the bathroom and it wouldn't stop coming out. We called labor and delivery and they told us to come in. We got there and they didn't let Travis come with me, but we figured they wouldn't. They asked me if I needed a wheelchair, and I said no, but it did not take me long to realize that I was very dizzy. By the time we got upstairs, I was seeing spots. I let the nurse know, and told her I would be declining any pelvic exams, and she said okay. She tried to take my blood pressure and it did not work. She tried 3 more cycles, and it did not work. I knew it was low. She had to get a new machine and tried it and she asked me if I normally had low blood pressure. I said no, and was brought juices and they also told Travis he could come up. She took my blood to do some more blood work. The visit was pretty pointless and we were sent home with in the hour. I did ask the doctor that saw me if it could be from people pushing on my stomach. She was very concerned and asked why anyone would be pushing on my stomach. I told her, the other doctor. She said that, yes, that would cause bleeding.

Week 21 was a lot of getting things in order. We got my medical records and noticed that my visit from the first time I was bleeding was missing, as well as dates on all the notes and information. I also found out that I was anemic back at my February appointment, and they never prescribed me iron at that appointment or the next appointment and went on to cancel my appointment in April. Anemia causes complications in 1 in 3 pregnancies. I'm not saying that is why this happened, but I know it did not help me or Declan. Travis started our paperwork to get our flight information, and the travel people let us know it couldn't be processed correctly because the doctors did not submit the paperwork correctly with Travis listed on it. I immediately gave them a call and left a message to get that fixed. When they called me back they argued that it was submitted correctly and that they have never needed to put names before. Travis went back to talk to travel, and they called the doctors and got everything fixed. They booked my ticket for May 20th, and as of now they still have not booked Travis a ticket. I won't go into more details on all of our back and forth with getting our travel approved, but it's getting there.

We also started packing up our house. Our landlords have been very understanding, and Travis and I decided it would be financially beneficial to move out of our house while in Anchorage and move everything into a much cheaper storage. We got some bubble wrap and I wrapped everything up and folded all of our clothes to pack so I had something to do.

We said goodbye to the baby Yoda I painted for Travis as his Christmas present. He has been watching over us in our living room above out TV, but now he has to watch over our storage. We also took down all of our paintings and pictures. The house feels so empty now with the bare walls. Mavis has been very needy. She clearly knows something is going on, and is nervous with the packing. We are getting all the Mavis cuddles that we can before we go. I haven't been away from her from more than one whole day and two nights since I got her last September, and she may be a little spoiled.

Any time I try to pack something or fold clothes to be packed, she lays down on them so I cannot do anything with them. We got a call from the nurse who was supposed to watch her for us. She could no longer watch her because she had a family emergency. We immediately started looking into boarding options, getting her on the plane with us, and keeping her in our hotel. We were lucky enough to hear from a family friend, Brian, who has family in Alaska. He told us to give his cousin a call and she would help us find someone. After the call it was decided that she was going to watch Mavis for us until the travel ban was lifted, which has already been extended from May 19th to June 2nd at least. We couldn't be more grateful for these kind people.

Our 22 week appointment came and went without much concern or any change in plan. at this point we have packed most of the house, and Travis goes to finalize travel tomorrow. We got in a baby book/keepsake box that I ordered before everything happened. We have filled it out the best that we could so far, and plan to fill it out as long as we can. In the event that we aren't able to continue to fill it out, we have decided to fill it with cards and letters from our friends, family, and anyone who wants to support us. If you want to add to the baby book with a keepsake, card, or letter, please send them to 200 Youngsville Hwy, Unit A, Lafayette, La 70508. We know that not everyone can donate to us, but if you can send a little card please do. We also know a lot of people have wanted to reach out to us, but have also been respecting our wishes to not be contacted. This gives those people a chance to send their kindness to us, and gives us time to cope with everything going on before reading anything.

I believe that is all of the updates for now. Our next goal is just to make it to our appointment in Anchorage, and drop Mavis off with her doggie sitter. Hopefully the next update will be from Providence hospital in Anchorage and I will be 23 weeks. And as always, we want to thank everyone for all the support, donations, and help.